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I still haven't heard from Dr. Dalton, the orthopedic doc that's looking at my MRI results of my knee. I'll post on here as soon as i find out something.

This is gonna be lengthy... Don't feel obligated to read it. If you do, bear with me.

The Med Clinic here at the MLC has revoked my medical clearance. That means if things stay like they are, i can't go to Peru. Now, if my MRI says that i don't have an ACL tear, then they may reinstate my medical clearance, or they might give me a conditional clearance. That means i'd have to do whatever they say i need to do to make sure this knee doesn't give problems down the road. Now, if the results say that i do have an ACL tear, then surgery will be necessary. This will mean that Peru will be postponed/delayed (until next season or indefinately). If so, i don't know if i will be expected to come to a later FPO or stay and finish this one. If they tell me to leave this FPO, i reckon i could reopen Teddy's Tasty Treats (my mobil ice cream service at SWO last year when i broke my foot). Obviously, i don't want to have to reopen TTT. I want Dr. Dalton to call me ASAP and tell me i don't have an ACL tear. But what does God want? Who knows?

I was asked yesterday if i am "accident prone." It was humorous because "accident prone" is an oxymoron. If someone is prone to be a certain way, it would dilute the opportunity for chance or accidents to happen. Nevertheless, i answered, "yes," because i have had a series of serious accidents throughout my life and i understood what they were implying. I have spent my share of time in the emeregency room. However, because accidents have happened before in my life, that doesn't necesarily mean that i will ever be in the emergency room again. That's the nature of chance and probability. If i roll a die 10 times and 9 times it lands on 4, the probablity that it will land on 4 again doesn't change. It is still a 1 out of 6 chance (because a die has 6 sides). However, i think my history of accidents may influence their desisions. Make sense?

Today, while doing push-ups, my shoulder shot with pain. Did my bone spurs regrow since my 2004 surgery? Will i need surgery for this too!? Should i tell the Med Clinic and make them even more scared of sending me? What if it's just nothing? How can i stay in shape without running and doing good push-ups? Am i missing something? A lesson from God? Is that why i keep getting hurt? Why do i keep thinking of questions to which i know there are no answers at this point?

It seems that my physical body won't keep up with God's call on my life. Nevertheless, i know that God's sovereignty over my body won't contradict His calling for me. It feels like God has been preparing me for the last 2.5 years for the Xtreme Team, showing me all the ways He's brought me against the current thus far, placing me on the Xtreme Team to reach unreached people with His message, and now the rug is being pulled out from under me. Who's pulling the rug? God? Satan? -Doesn't matter cause God is sovereign. He will do whatever pleases Him. He will receive His glory whether i go, or wait, or don't go. He cannot be robbed of that. If it is Satan, i know he has enslaved these areas and people where the Xtreme Team is going to since time began and is not willing to give them up now without a fight. Bring it on. My God will fight for me.

These things are those which i cannot control. I'm fine not being in control. It is nothing new for me.

Some may think, "Well, maybe these are things you can't know and understand." In this case i don't buy that. He's not going to put me (or allow me to be put, for that matter) through the fire and not refine me and teach me something. He will teach me in this, as in everything. I just need to listen. Nevertheless, i must wait. I will wait on God always. And today, i will wait on Dr. Dalton and his phone call.